After 15 years in quantum superposition, Scurrilous Ephemera crawls back into the observable universe to check on Dolly, Gloria, Lindsay, Paris, Speidi and Jersey Shore.
‘Twihards, watch out. There are some new weird obsessives out there now waiting to steal your creepy thunder…’
‘… a beautiful, intelligent, misunderstood girl who gets caught up in the glamorous world of punditry, only to be sexually harassed…’
From monkey babies and Crocs to Jersey Shore, Spencer Pratt and Lady Gaga, Scurrilous Ephemera looks back at the best and worst of the double aughts.
Ivana Trump gets kicked off a plane, Charlie Sheen has a disastrous Christmas and Jon Gosselin provides another reason not to care.
‘The Lollapaloozas, Birkenstocks-as-regular-footwear (you know who you are), mushrooms and ska bands, Mr. Lifto, Paralyzers, the flowery sundresses with cowboy boots and sexy/messy flannel shirts. Sigh…’
Jersey Shore introduces the world to The Situation, Marilyn Manson reunites with Evan Rachel Wood and George Michael offers perhaps a little too much information.
‘Jessica Alba didn’t earn the endearment “MiserAlba” for nothing. She looks borderline homicidal at the best of times…’
‘The harlot of the moment, Rachel Uchitel, is scoring the kind of money-can’t-buy-it publicity that will certainly propel her straight to reality TV stardom, along with Ashley Dupre (Elliott Spitzer’s hooker friend), those obnoxious White House Party Crashers, and Balloon Boy’s Family…’
Can Brad and Angelina survive tabloid fabrication? Can humanity survive Speidi procreation? And does anyone really need ABBA back together?
Lady Gaga has a Bad Romance, Pete Doherty suspects foul play, the Kardashians make questionable decisions and violent baboons prepare to take over the world.
Also – Robert Pattinson’s boy-crush on Zac Efron, and Ashlee Simpson contributes her fashion sense to a waiting world.
Carrie Prejean has an explanation, Lindsay Lohan has a job and the Kardashians continue their apparently unstoppable rise through American culture.
Lindsay Lohan turns up with Gerard Butler, Ian Brown gets arrested and Kirstie Alley’s new reality show sends Scurrilous Ephemera into mourning for the old A&E.
Levi Johnston prepares for Playgirl, Robert Pattinson would like the Twihards to calm down and Anderson Cooper takes a trip to India.
Need a Halloween costume? Scurrilous Ephemera suggests Megalodon, Octomom’s tortured uterus, Morrissey’s tortured soul and other terrible ideas.
Michael Bublé beats New Moon, Thom Yorke and the Killers on the Billboard chart, revealing the awesome purchasing power of uncool people everywhere.
Paranormal Activity causes sleepless nights, La Toya Jackson talks to Michael, Lindsay Lohan gets burgled and Morrissey reminds us that existence is futile.
Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt find a novel way to avoid family obligations, while George Clooney gives aging moms everywhere some bad news.
